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Me pēhea te kōrero ki te tangata kei te pā ki te patu tūkino whānau

He mea nui te aroha me te manawanui. Kei te whakawātea koe i te āhuatanga mōna ki te kōrero.

Me tika te wā, me haumaru te wāhi mō te kōrero

Me ki he wā me te wāhi tōtika kāore he whakapōreareatanga – ko kōrua anake kei konā, ā, kei te haumaru te āhua o te tangata e māharahara ana koe.

Me mātua takatū koe mō tētahi kōrero uaua pea. Mēnā kāore koe i te rite, i te takatū rānei, me waiho mō tētahi atu wā.

Me whakaaronui ki te tangata mēnā ka whakarerekēhia te whakaritenga. Kāore pea ia i te rite ki te kōrero. Kei te whakahaumaru pea i a ia anō.

Kei te āta matirohia pea ia e tana hoa, ā, ka aukati pea ia i tana kite i ōna hoa, i tōna whānau rānei. Arā anō pea te mōrea kei patua ia e tana hoa mēnā ka whakaaro ia kei te rapu āwhina ia. He mea nui ēnei kōrerorero, ā, he pai tonu te kōrero mō ngā mōrea ka pā pea ki te tangata ina kōrero ana ki ētahi atu mō tōna haumaru.

Me pātai atu mēnā kei te pai ia — me whakaatu kei te māharahara koe mōna.

Kaua e whakawā i a ia

Me whakaaro koe mō te āhua e hiahia ana koe mōna nō reira me hāngai te āhua o tō tinana me tō reo. Me āio tō āhua, kaua e riri, e werowero rānei. Kaua e whakaara kōrero i runga i te āhua kei te ‘hāpaiora’.

Me kōrero mō te manaaki, te ngākau atawhai, te tautoko, te aroha.

Close up of two people sitting on a couch and clasping hands.

Me kōrero atu koe mō ō kitenga

Me noho ki ngā kōrero tika, kaua pōhēhē – me kōrero mō ngā mea kua kite koe me te take kei te māharahara, kaua mō ō whakaaro. He hāngai pū rawa te kōrero atu ki te tangata kei te pā ia ki te patu tūkino whānau, ā, he nui rawa ngā pōhēhē mō ōna āhuatanga. Kei mutu tonu tōna hiahia ki te kōrero ki a koe.

Tērā pea i kite koe i tētahi mea, engari kei reira anō tētahi tangata pai ake i a koe ki te kōrero mō tēnei.

 

Kei a ia te tikanga

Mēnā kei te pā te tangata ki te patu tūkino whānau, me kaha ia ki te tuku i āna ake whakatau mō te whiwhi āwhina, me te tere e rata ana ki a ia.

Mēnā kāore te tangata e māharahara ana koe i te hiahia ki te kōrero, kaua e whakahau i a ia. Otirā, ki te kore ia e urupare ki tāu e manako ana, kaua e kī atu kei te hē ia, te whakahau rānei i ō whakaaro ki runga i a ia.

Ka tino hē pea te urupare a te tangata kei te pā ki te patu tūkino ki ō āwhina. Kei te mataku pea ia, ka mutu kei te pēhia pea ia e tōna hoa. Ehara i te mea i te hē koe mō te tuku āwhina, engari kaua rawa koe e whakahau i ō āwhina mēnā kāore ia i te reri.

Me whakarongo ki ōna hiahia

Mēnā kāore te tangata i toro atu koe i te hiahia kōrero, me whakarongo me te tautoko i a ia ki te tuku whakatau ina rite ana ia.

Rapu mōhio anō mō ngā mea ka taea e koe hei tautoko i te hunga kei te pā ki te patu tūkino whānau

Me noho tuwhera tō tono ki te kōrero

Me kōrero atu ki a ia ka wātea koe ki te kōrero ki a ia ina reri ana ia, ka mutu he tautoko atu anō kei reira mēnā e hiahia ana ia.

Me whakapā atu anō ki a ia mēnā kei te kite koe i ngā āhuatanga e māharahara ana koe. Me mātua whakarite kei te mōhio ia kei konā koe mōna ina reri ia ki te kōrero.

Me noho haumaru kōrua mēnā ka kōrero haere tonu kōrua

Me mātua whakarite e kore te nanakia e mōhio mō ā kōrua kōrerorero tahi me ngā āwhina ka tukuna e koe. Hei tauira, me whai whakaaro ki te whakamahi i ngā kupu me ngā kīanga huna — ko te tikanga pea o ‘Te tiki miraka mai i te hokomaha’ ko ‘Me waea atu ki ngā pirihimana’. Me tūtaki i ngā wāhi e āhei ana ia, ā, he wāhi tūmatanui pea.

Me rapu mōhio anō mō ngā mahi whaitake kia haumaru ai

 

E toru ngā mea hei kōrero māu mēnā ka kōrero mai te tangata ki a koe mō te patu tūkino whānau

Ka kōrero atu pea te tangata ki a koe kei te pā ia ki te patu tūkino whānau. He nui ngā tāngata kei te rapu āwhina ka kōrero kē atu ki ō rātau hoa, whānau hoki kaua te hunga ngaio.

Ka noho pea koe ki reira whakaaroaro ai he aha he kōrero. E toru ngā mea hei whakaaroaro. Me kōrero anake koe i tēnei mēnā kei te pai koe.

‘Kei te whakapono ahau ki ō kōrero.’

‘Kei te arohaina, kei te manaakitia koe, ā, ko te tikanga me haumaru koe.’

Ā, mēnā kua rite koe ki te kōkiri me kī atu koe, ‘Me pēhea taku āwhina i a koe? Kei konei ahau ki te tautoko i a koe.’